Monday, June 29, 2009

My Frightening Week

I haven't been feeling so well the last few weeks, which I attributed to the overwhelming demand of my summer nursing classes. I'd been having lots of fatigue, weakness, dizziness, and general exhaustion. Finally, last week I felt so terrible, my husband took me to the ER to be checked out. I had started having this burning sensation through my chest into my shoulder blades. As soon as the Triage nurse heard that, I was taken straight into the back and put on an EKG. After many hours and tests, which all came back mostly normal, they decided to admit me over night for observation. The next day I had a echocardiogram, and the Cardiologist came in to see me. He felt that in light of my very strong history/risk factors, such as my Dad's coronary artery disease and early death at age 50, my high blood pressure and my low HDL [good cholesterol level} that I should have a cardiac catheterization to know for sure where I stood. Turns out I have 30% narrowing in 2 of my 3 coronary arteries.
My anxiety has been through the roof and I've been so scared. I feel angry too that I've tried all these years to do the right things for my heart and STILL I have the beginnings of CAD. I don't smoke, I don't drink, I'm a vegetarian who exercises ALL THE TIME!
But, I now know that it is going to take an extra level of diligence from me to stop the progression of this disease. I don't want to die young. I want to live into my 80's at least!
I am going to monitor my blood pressure like a hawk, and to continue to lose the weight I've needed to lose for a long time! {I have already lost 32 lbs over the last 4 months simply by keeping a food diary and exercising religiously}
I am also now on Niaspan which is supposed to raise my HDL {the little 'scrubbers' that help carry out the bad cholesterol}
I have also taken my diet to a whole new level of healthy.
I'm still very scared, but I think I'm supposed to be.
Only that will motivate the right amount of change to make a difference.


Elefanterosado said...

Marie, I'm so sorry you're going through all of this scary stuff. It seems very unfair when you've taken such good care of yourself. For what it's worth, have you read "The Power of Now"? (I'm thinking you probably have, given your interests). I like his section on disease, and how by just looking at it as an imbalance that hasn't actually turn into a full blown disease or illness in the now can offset further machinations of our minds to make things worse. I also like the story of the woman with breast cancer in the movie "The Secret" who just kept watching positive movies and said "thank you for my healing" every day, over and over again. Her cancer eventually went into remission without any chemo or drugs.

The power of the universe is strong...I know it will come to your aid and all will be well. You have much to live for!

FjordWoman said...

Thank you so much, Mary!
I've been so scared I'm beside myself. I've so internalized growing up with a Dad suffering from this disease that I'm practically convincing myself of the worst for me too!
I am working on the now and will definitely read Tolle's book!

billie said...

Oh no! Sending healing thoughts to you - and I think you're right that this is a wake up call and you can make whatever changes you need to make to bring this whole thing back to a state of "ease"...